While all people, and therefore all zodiac signs are capable and culpable when it comes to blatant untruths, white lies, abject dishonesty, intricate webs of fiction and fabricated yarns, there are a few among the wheel that tick the top for biggest liar.
In his epic novel, “The Neverending Story” Scorpio Michael Ende writes, “When it comes to controlling human beings there is no better instrument than lies. Because, you see, humans live by beliefs. And beliefs can be manipulated. The power to manipulate beliefs is the only thing that counts.”
Controlling humans? Manipulating belief structures, points made and taken like a true, and truly ruthless scorpion.
In tribute to tall tales and the tell tale nose of a wooden puppet, here are the signs that rank high when it comes to telling lies.
GEMINI (May 21 – June 20)
Geminis lie because for them, the truth is a shifting, negotiable, nebulous orb of possibilities and their recollection of facts and events is equal parts actual occurrence and absolute hallucination.
A Gemini’s relationship with honesty is on and off and utterly dependent on the mood they are in and the agenda they are pushing. Donald Trump, Kanye West and Hubert-Joseph Henry are all Geminis.
I rest my case.
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SCORPIO (October 23 – November 21)
Well versed in the art of omission, Scorpios leverage the lies of others and wield their own own like a well loved weapon.
Often, their withholding, of both truth and intimacy, is the symptom of an inability to trust others and/or themselves.
Chronically suspicious, Scorpios harbor the fear that everyone is out to overpower or outwit them so they often lie in a bid to dominate their opponent, enemy, child, lover or dog walker.
Aces as they are at psychological manipulation, when caught in a lie a Scorpio will make their accuser question the fabric of their own reality to such a degree that truth as a concept is called into question.
They succeed because they love a cover up and thrive in shadow.
There is no notable list of Scorpio liars because as masters of the game, they rarely fail or fall into being found out.
CAPRICORN (December 22 – January 19)
Capricorns don’t lie for pleasure, it’s all business baby.
They utter untruths solely to get ahead, play the game and make a buck.
We see this modality in the deceptions of some of history’s most famous sea goats, including but not limited to Richard “Watergate” Nixon, Robert “Believe It or Not” Ripley, Benedict “traitor” Arnold, Anna “Anastasia imposter” Anderson, Pope Alexander VI, Kim “double agent” Philby and Victor Lustwig. This sam artist dubiously sold the Eiffel Tower, twice.
Astrology 101: Your guide to the stars
Astrologer Reda Wigle researches and irreverently reports back on planetary configurations and their effect on each zodiac sign. Her horoscopes integrate history, poetry, pop culture and personal experience. She is also an accomplished writer who has profiled a variety of artists and performers, as well as extensively chronicled her experiences while traveling. Among the many intriguing topics she has tackled are cemetery etiquette, her love for dive bars, Cuban Airbnbs, a “girls guide” to strip clubs and the “weirdest” foods available abroad.